Who am I anyway?
...
After 25 years as an
award winning
advertising Execu-
woman I'm on a
campaign to inspire
women to unzip their
inner joy through
my writing, paintings
and transformational
speaking. To find out
more about me
zip
over here.



Do you know a Goddess
of Transformation?

Each month we'll honor
a woman who has
changed her life or
someone else's. 

Contact me to
nominate yourself or
another goddess
(and tell me why).

How to lose weight this Thanksgiving.

I hope you’re not too terribly disappointed.

But you won’t find any  recipes for low-fat stuffing, sugar-free yams or diet pumpkin pie here.

These days, I’m much more  interested in counting blessings than calories.

But I’ve noticed that all of us can be weighted down at times by the old hurts and disappointments that we still carry around with us.

So, in honor of Thanksgiving, I’d like to share some musings and schmoozings to lighten the load.

And make room for more joy.

It all starts with a simple strategy:
FINDING WHAT’S RIGHT
WHEN THINGS GO WRONG.

Here’s an example from my own life to show you how it can work in yours:

The other night, our 15 year old son  had “plans”with some friends.

If you have a teenager, you understand the parenthesis.

(Their “plans” can change faster than a speeding text message.)

I’ll spare you the details. but at 11:30 PM, the spooky night before Halloween, he ended up all alone on a very dark corner of Sunset Blvd.

On the ride to pick him up, my mind took a detour into some terrifying worst case scenarios (courtesy of a long line of Jewish grandmothers.)

Then I stopped myself. Breathed. And shifted the direction of my thoughts.

(They call this “pivoting”in the brilliant Abraham book, Ask and It is Given.)

INSTEAD OF TORTURING MYSELF FURTHER,
I FOCUSED ON GRATITUDE:

1. He was in the Pacific Palisades.  Not on Skid Row.

2. He had just enough cells left on his phone to tell us where.

3. My husband and I were only 12 minutes away.

When we got there, our fiercely independent 15 year old was more like his former Scared-Of-Monsters-Under-The-Bed-Self.

Even so, part of me wanted to scream at him “what the hell…”

INSTEAD, I STOPPED AND BREATHED.

I forced myself to listen with a compassionate heart to his story of plans gone awry.

And by my calmly listening, he felt safer sharing.

And then, he listened (without a single “Yes, but…”) as I shared suggestions of how to avoid a mix-up next time.

You know what?

BY FOCUSING ON THE GIFTS OF THIS EXPERIENCE,
OUR RELATIONSHIP HAS ACTUALLY SHIFTED.
In fact, a couple of days later, my son called me from school during lunch.

Not because he was in trouble. Or needed his homework or football cleats.

He called just to share a “really cool idea” that he and his friend came up with in Graphic Design class.

My heart m-e-l-t-e-d.

Yeah, I know there’s more rebelliousness and teen angst around the corner.

But for now, I’m relishing this experience. And the joy of sharing it with you.

MY SUGGESTION?

Take a piece of paper and fold it in half.

On the left of the page, make a list of  the “struggles” you in your life.

On the right side, list the gifts that have come from those experiences.

You can do this with anything in your life.  Past. Present. Whatever.

It’s a simple but very powerful process.

By finding the gifts in our struggles, we can transform some of the “oy’s” in our lives into joys.

SO, HERE’S TO MORE JOY
AND LESS “OY” THIS THANKSGIVING.

And tons of gratitude from me to you for all the support, feedback and love you’re giving me as I unzip more and more of my True Self.

Speaking of unzipping, as always,  I’d love to hear what you have to say.

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16 comments to How to lose weight this Thanksgiving.

  • Barby D. Cahill

    Hi Wendi, Love the help that you give me!!!
    XOXO Barby Happy Thanksgiving

  • “we can transform some of the “oy’s” in our lives into joys.”
    You and your Husband and me and my Wife share the turbulence of raising teenagers. Our biggest fear is they don’t ever do what we did. But just maybe our past is what makes us so compassionate, loving and understanding. Just maybe they feel this and would never do anything to break our hearts. Whether it is Old Testament or New we our restless nights will be rewarded with grandchildren and then and only then will we kick back and go Whew, we did it.
    Again Wendi my dear little JAP I am so glad you have come into my life and I only wish you and your family a wonderful holiday season.

    Swann in Corpus

  • Wendi, This is so beautiful! Thank you. I love the your musings and schmoozings that come along with incredible tools for transformation.

    I support you wholeheartedly as you continue to unzip more of your True Self. This is a great gift for everyone!

    xoxo
    Tabby

  • ruth

    thanks wendy. i’m not usually into the spiritual/inspirational side of life, but the clarity, simplicity and ‘hey – take a deep breath and take a step back and realize what you have’ nature of this was lovely.

  • fredie

    Wen, this blog warmed my spirit! So glad you and Landon had open hearts and open minds when it could of gone so easily, closed hearts & angry mind. I always tell my mommy friends, listen with love before showing anger. listen with love, listen with love………happy turkey day for you et family…..give them all hugs for me!

  • This is great! Love every word and every brush stroke – especially more joy less oy! Thanks for the timely message Goddess… xo

  • Victoria Young

    Indeed, the practice of focusing on the positive has incredible power to shift the dynamic of relationships and situations. Just now am I learning how much better it is to tame the anger/frustration in tough situations and instead, look for positives to focus on. Your beautiful post is a wonderful reminder! :) Love the stories, as always. Miss you Wendi! xoxo

  • Krikit

    Oh, Wendi, if I could only give you a great BIG hug along with this “Thank you!” ~:)

    I struggle so much of late with what seems to be more “Oys” than I can gracefully handle. I need strategies just like this one you describe to help me reconnect with my center of Joy.

    I know that it is by the transformation of my thinking that I will transform my behavior. Now I have another tool to aid me in that endeavor thanks to you.

    XOXOX,
    Krikit ~:)

    • Dear Krikit….here’s a virtual. And please don’t be heard on yourself. You have had so, so many struggles lately, it is totally understandable that you wold be overwhelmed.
      If in any small way, I could ease some of that pain, I feel grateful. Much love to you xoxoxo

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